Excellent article. I’m a Mother-Daughter Relationship Therapist and a kiwi who lives in America. I want to applaud you for writing about your experiences in navigating becoming a mother. We need to talk about society’s definition of motherhood much more loudly and change it, because it has never worked for women. Working with mothers and daughters I see the harm the selfless, sacrificing motherhood role inflicts on women’s emotional wellbeing and how it causes mother-daughter relationship conflict. In my work I empower mothers and daughters to recognize that Mothers are People First, because they are. Why is it that when a woman becomes a mother her identity as her own person disappears and a man’s identity doesn’t when he comes a father?